How Far I've Come

Friday 13 July 2018


As I sit down to start writing blog posts after a day of spending six hours with friends, chatting nonstop and laughing at anything and everything, catching four trains by myself, and not feeling completely wiped out by it, I have a realisation.

I've come so far.

Gone is the anxiety-riddled, friendless, borderline agoraphobic fourteen year old who didn't see the point in anything because life was shit. Who could barely leave the house even with 'safe' people. Who didn't speak to anyone and isolated herself. Who didn't see herself having a future filled with friends and happiness.

In her place is a blossoming 21 year old who, while still prone to excessive worry and panic attacks, can manage her symptoms, push through, and enjoy life. A 21 year old who's at uni, confidently sharing things online, has a small group of amazing, loyal, honest, trustworthy, kind friends, who can sit on a train for an hour by herself, who wants to plan day trips, who comes home and flops into bed with an exhausted smile on her face, not just because she's worn herself out.

At fourteen, the world seemed dark and like it was beating me down. Seven years later it's not so bad. It's taken time and I still have a long way to go, but boy have I come far.

6 comments:

  1. I loved reading this and it made me so happy to hear how far you've come. It takes courage to write about these things so candidly, and you've done so with poise and confidence. You're a fab person and I can say with complete honesty that my life has been enriched from meeting you in person, and that I can't wait for us to meet up again soon <3

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    1. Awwww, Kate! This is such a sweet comment thank you so much! It makes me happy that you're happy for me, in the least big-headed way possible haha. It just feels good that other people can see these things in me, too, if that makes sense. And yes, we definitely have to plan something soon!

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  2. youre such a fab person. im v proud of you

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